Me and the Acupuncturist

I have mentioned before that I struggle daily with pain. I have been taking some pretty strong medication for it, and while that medication really doesn't seriously impact my day to day responsibilities, I would prefer not to be taking it. It is because of that reason that I started seeing an acupuncturist.

Typically I am skeptical of such things. While I trust the scientific method, and appreciate the value of empirical data, I also recognize that acupuncture has been around for a very long time, and I am open to the idea that perhaps it is a viable alternative to modern medicine that just hasn't been fully explored yet.

I also think that it might be true that one of the reasons the scientific community hasn't shown the practice of acupuncture any love is because it claims to tap into something that doesn't exist, or at least hasn't been proven to exist. Acupuncture is all about the tweaking of your "meridians", and claims to provide relief by re-balancing "yin", "yang" and "qi".

In any case, I spoke with my doctor about it and she thought as I did, that there must be something to it since it has been practiced for thousands of years, and millions more swear by it. Even if it is just the power of suggestion, if a person experiences the expected results then there's no refuting that, on some level, it works.

So my wife found a licensed acupuncturist, and secured an appointment with him. Once she told me his name, I did what I do with almost everyone who performs a service for me. I Googled him.

It turns out that in addition to being a licensed acupuncturist he is also a "medicinal herb specialist" and a doctor of oriental medicine. How one goes about achieving these things, I don't know. But it still sounds impressive, and his office is just as impressive. He has his diplomas and certificates on the wall for inspection, and if I could read Chinese I am sure I would be even more impressed. He also has vials and baggies of herbs all over the place, and he is happy to explain to you what is in each container, and what it is supposed to do. He is pleasant, mild mannered, and well spoken. He makes you feel at ease, and has a real passion for his work. I like him.

I have seen him four times now, and it costs me about a hundred bucks for each session. Mainly he performs the acupuncture, and sends me home with some herbs that are supposed to help me counter aspects of my life that are contributing to my pain. While I have yet to see any real results, I have been a trooper and try to keep an open mind. But, my since last session I am starting to have some serious qualms about his practice.

During the past week my pain level has been pretty high. I told the acupuncturist this, and also told him that I had what people refer to as tennis elbow. Because of the meds I am on, I am obliged to see my doctor each month, and when I saw her last week I told her of my elbow, and she confirmed that it was indeed tennis elbow. The acupuncturist examined my elbow, and told me to bring my chair closer to the table. He placed a white sheet of paper in front of me, and told me to put my left hand palm down on my thigh. He positioned me in my chair, and then placed a container with some capsules, (presumably a herb of some sort,) in front of me, and told me to put my had palm down on the container.

Then he waved a crystal in front of me.

The large, clear crystal was suspended on what appeared to be fishing line, and he would sort of wave it around my hand and arm much like a hypnotist would do in front of your face. In fact, at first I thought he was trying to hypnotize me!

He would change containers, and swing the crystal over my hand again and again. At one point he put two containers under my hand, and almost immediately after the first pass of the crystal he said, "Incompatible", and took the containers back. He removed a couple of capsules from each, put them back under my palm, and swung the crystal again. "That's better", he said, evidently satisfied with the new combination.

To be honest, I was shocked. So much so in fact that I couldn't bring myself to ask him about it because I knew it would come out in an accusing tone. I just couldn't buy into the idea that swinging a pretty rock over my hand while it covered some plant matter would make one iota of difference with my pain.

Like I said, I am a skeptic. But I think I am an open minded skeptic. I don't believe you can dismiss something out-of-hand unless you experience it yourself, even if you do investigate it using the scientific method and find it to be bogus. Maybe there is something about it that is real, and we just can't quantify it through the tools available to us today.

On the other hand, maybe it is strictly a matter of mind over matter, or the power of suggestion. Perhaps that is why it hasn't worked on me so far. I just don't believe in it enough. But I seriously doubt that the whole crystal swinging thing has any effect on anyone. It certainly didn't have an effect on me.

It is late afternoon, and I am in as much pain as I normally would be, and I am about to do something I know for a fact will get rid of my pain. I am going to get a glass of water and take my 80mg of Oxycontin.

Posted by Jeff at August 1, 2006 7:56 AM